Jkel1

Problem-Solution Essay =My Organizational Problem= Whenever I have to get stuff from my locker I get yelled at for being late. Once my teacher told me,"Julius, get your locker cleaned so you are not late for class anymore! Now, I am going to have to give you a detention for being late!" My locker is a mess. It needs to get fixed. I need to organize it.
 * //__rough draft__//**

Instead of just quashing everything in my locker and everything poor out like a deluge. I should neatly put my books down in my locker rather than having it like a tsunami hit. Once I yelled, "//**OW**//" because some stuff shot out of my locker in a barrage and hit me in the knee. Just throwing my books into my locker is a bad habit.

Organizing it will help me get to class **//ON TIME!//** Plus it will help me find my pens and pencils. I can never find my pens and pencils I always have to borrow from other people. People always say, "Get your own pencil!" After I clean my locker people will now //**not**// say to me, "Get your own pencils!"

I can organize it but it will take time. I could come in at recess, after school, or before school. I have decided that recess will be the best time to clean my locker.

My locker //**WAS**// a problem until I applied the solution. My locker does not cascade down on me now, it does not look like a tsunami hit now, and I can definitely find my pens and pencils now.

Ideas - 5 Organization -5 Word Choice 5 Voice - 5 Fluency - 4 Most of your sentences are the same length. Conventions - 5 GRADE = 29/30 = A